Welcome to this week’s issue of the #beingamother project. I’m delighted to open up the floor to Victoria from Tea Cup Toria, whose submission to the project is one that is not only so beautifully heartfelt, but also one that will resonate with any single mums out there following this series. And so without further ado, here is Victoria with her take on that beautifully extraordinary thing called motherhood…
Motherhood is everything to me.
I have one child, a gorgeous 9 year old boy. He was born my son but over the years he has become my best friend. He’s been my constant through so much; a constant source of happiness, a constant motivation, a constant companion.
During the early years of sleepless nights and toddler tantrums, my marriage ended. Overnight, I became a first time mother on my own with a one year old and I didn’t have a clue what I was doing. Sometimes I look back and wonder how these events have shaped us.
I wonder how things would have been if I was still married and we were still a family. Would I have been the same mother? Would I have tried so hard? Would I have had the same relationship with my son? I think the answer to all these questions is quite simply, no.
Because I look and see how happy we are, the experiences we’ve shared, the decisions I’ve been able to make and what an amazing person my boy is growing up to be. I look at what we have achieved and the love I have in my life and it makes me thankful for the hand that I was dealt.
Being a single mum to an only child is a remarkable experience. We had eight magical years as a two-some and those years have created a constant closeness. In the early years I was desperate for things to be different and now I wouldn’t change any of it for the world.
There have been many challenges and money has always been tight, but as a result my son isn’t materialistic. Our riches have been the people in our lives and the memories we have made along the way, and boy have we made some memories.
Motherhood has shaped my life like nothing else.
It has given me purpose, meaning and appreciation. It has given me sheer joy and of course, at times, sheer desperation. If I wasn’t a mother I’m sure I would focus more on the superficial parts of life, but having a child makes you plan your time carefully. I savour every moment, whether they are special moments with my child or equally, precious moments without him, doing something for myself.
Motherhood has brought me friendships and a community of kind hearted, like-minded people linked together by the common goal of surviving this ultimate test of endurance. Together we marvel at the wonder, we share in the angst and cherish the milestones of parenting. These amazing people offer support and joyful camaraderie like nothing else on this planet.
My journey through motherhood may not have been the easiest, or the most perfect but I like to think it’s been extraordinary.
Isn’t that what motherhood really is?
Simply and beautifully extraordinary.