Do first impressions count?

first impressions count

Throughout life, you constantly told one of two things – 1) first impressions count and 2) don’t judge a book by it’s cover.

I have to say that prior to becoming a mum, I was much more in the camp of number one..you know, you’d walk into an office with a swanky reception desk and feel like yup! these guys are winning in life!

And it seems to be that this is something that research backs up – apparently it takes only one tenth of a second for us to make up our minds about people. Which if I’m having a bad mum day – which is more often than not likely to be the case –  than uh oh! I am in for a stack of potentially misguided initial preconceptions of my character. And if you don’t believe me, you can test yourself by watching this video here:

That being said, in my fourth year of motherhood, I have actually learnt that yes, first impressions do play a big part in things. Yes, we do tend to make judgements based on the way someone looks or acts in that first moment, but actually….you also need to read between the lines too,  trust your gut and lean more over to number two – don’t judge a book by its cover.

Because sometimes you might catch the lady down the road having an utterly vile day while she goes absolutely postal at her unrelenting tantrum-ing toddler, but that doesn’t make her a bad person…just that she is pushed to her limits and is not her very best self at the moment in time.

So when it comes first impressions, although first impressions might matter, I’m not sure they are something we can totally swear by because we never know a person’s backstory a few minutes before meeting, before that moment, or from that week. We need to have the second, third, fourth and even fifth impression before we can really make an assessment of someone’s character surely and  perhaps then, when we have a bigger picture rather than that initial tiny snapshot of someone’s personality, we can make an assessment of what someone’s really like.

I have been known to both swear by and go back on my first impressions after getting to know someone better which I think really shows that in both life and motherhood, we should keep an open mind and try not to make any snap judgements.

What do you think about the notion that first impressions really count? Do you swear by first impressions? Or do you tend to take a more slow burn attitude to finding out what someone’s really like? Do leave a comment and share your experiences below.

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*This is a collaborative post

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