Parent problems: If parents sexted…



I have to admit, that somehow I missed out on the whole sexting craze – guess I had already become a granny mum by the time it rolled around. But it did make me thing how different sexting must be before and after being parents. I mean, do parents even sext at all? Or is that too much to ask in the face of all our sex-related parent problems? If they did, I think the post-parenthood sexts would end up something more like this…(N.B. these are not real life sexting tips!!!).

or perhaps more like this…
or how about this…?
does this sound familiar?
yeah don’t try to deny it…
What would you post-parent sexts look like? Come on, this is a total can of worms so lets have some fun opening it! Leave your spoof post-parenthood texts in a comment below….



  1. Absolutely cracking up at this! So funny! I have to admit me and hubs enjoy a bit of sexting when he’s away with work but now that munchkin is here that may well be a thing of the past! xxx #coolmumclub
    beautybabyandme recently posted…The TMI TagMy Profile

  2. So funny…I’ve always felt a bit dissappointed I’ll never get to try the whole tinder thing. Mind you…be carefu what you wish for! Here’s hoping I dont find myself unexpectedly single!
    Thanks for hosting the fab #coolmumclub 😉

  3. Haha this did make me laugh! When I met my first husband we didn’t even have mobile phones but when I found myself single again at 28 there was a whole new world of dating out there and sexting seemed to be a big thing!! Let’s just say that the texts my new husband and I sent to eachother are a whole world away from the texts we send eachother three children later!!!! #coolmumclub
    ljdove23 recently posted…For Eva, on your fourth birthdayMy Profile

  4. So so funny! I too missed the whole sexting phase, and now my eldest tends to be glued to my phone watching bloody Kinder Egg videos on You Tube. No sexting in this house haha.

    Thanks for the giggle!
    Dawn x

  5. I have actually sexted as I am single now but it’s not all its cracked up to be and I as a mom I got easily annoyed at the last guy who tried to sext with me while I was watching a movie with my 9 year old. I ended up blocking his ass because after I told him I was spending time with my son, he didn’t stop…the moron! Sexting can be fun but as a mom whose youngest likes to steal my phone every time I take a trip to the bathroom to make his own little videos, sexting has become a thing of the past but oh man, the next time someone tries it on me, the first one you posted had me in stitches and I do have two bad boys who like to destroy my house, LOL! I have to use that next time:-)
    nightwisprav3n recently posted…1 Tactic That Will Help You Grow Your Following: Meet and GreetMy Profile

  6. Loved having a good giggle at this, so funny! Me and my now hubby used to sext all the time, I was 20 when we met and it seemed to be the thing to do- cringe! Fast forward 3 years, throw in a house, wedding, baby and now if we even have time to text, they are mainly him texting me from work to check me and baby are still living. #coolmumclub

  7. Oh sexting. Some of my friends are into this, but I don’t get it. I’d rather talk on the phone or better yet, in person. ; ) It takes too long to write and doesn’t really feel all that ‘sexy.’ You could be sitting in the middle of Starbucks for all I know!

    My sexts would be like….

    Me: damn, I’m so wet!
    Husband: no way! I’ll be home in 5 mins and sort that out for you ; )
    Me: oh….
    Me: no
    Me: the kid puked on me again

    The Mum Project recently posted…A Man’s guide to baby growth during pregnancyMy Profile

  8. Ha!! Brilliant! When I was a LOT younger, I briefly went out with someone who sexted constantly! He actually seemed to be more into that than actually spending time with me and getting on with the real thing! Never done it with my husband though, he seems to have the slight misperception that I’m too ladylike!! I can imagine ours being something along the lines of ‘what’s your biggest fantasy…?’ ‘To get into bed alone with Ben and Jerrys and a bottle of Cloudy Bay, then for you to sleep on the sofa so I starfish in the bed all night…’ Just about sums it up!
    This Mum’s Life recently posted…Nutty Putty Review!My Profile

  9. There is no raunch left in my texts anymore…they are more like…”I cannot wait till you get home later; kids winding me up today; hanging out for your big cuddles”, etc….just the simple things, really. Gave me a giggle. #coolmumclub

  10. My husband and I recently discovered the “other” side of tumblr. In case you have no idea what I’m talking about, tumblr has a very “sexual” side to it and forget sexting…it’s all about the visual little tidbits we send one another. Nothing like a little sexual gifs to turn the fire on. 😉 thanks for hostessing #coolmumclub

  11. lol – it probably goes a little something like this in our house..

    Him: I’ve just dropped the kids off – not got to pick them up for an hour, be home in 5 😉

    Me: fine! as long as I don’t have to get fully undressed and you don’t expect me to get on top #justwanttoliedown x

    Its sometimes a bit of an effort to make the effort if you know what I mean haha?!

    funny post!
    laughing mum recently posted…Operation Bedtime, Husband and Wife Style..My Profile

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