Welcome to this edition of #MyFiveThings! Being a stay at home mum is hard and a strange mix of many blessings and hair tearing moments and it’s the trials and tribulations of at-home mummydom which is the topic for for this instalment of #MyFiveThings by the lovely Lynne from New Mummy Blog…
This is all tongue in cheek as I really LOVE being a mummy. I love being able to stay at home every day looking after Toddler H and come on, I wouldn’t have chosen to become a SAHM if I didn’t. These five things which drive me mad pretty much apply to mummies on maternity leave, mummies who work part-time and well I’m sure most mummies really nevermind many many daddy’s too.
Seriously, don’t you just miss hate not being able to…
1. Just go and pee!
I’m not going to say any more, it’s not a simple task. I have an audience now, she say’s “hi” she points at me, she plays the bin lid like a drum. It’s a luxury at the weekend when I can actually go to the toilet on my own.
2. Have a hot cup of tea…
It’s a small thing I know, but in the mind of a SAHM it’s HUGE. It’s a humongous deal. I know if I were at work, I’d have a nice hot cup of tea on my desk every couple of hours, ok, maybe every hour just because I could. I still might not drink it, but I could, and I would drink at least 3 hot cups each day, sat not watching cbeebies, sat having adult conversations.
And, another thing I’ve been pondering, I’m convinced coffee shops are filled with pushchairs just so mummy can have a chat. I think the real reasons is it’s the only place where mums get to sit and drink a hot cup of tea. I’m not saying I don’t enjoy my nice tea or coffee out and the breather, but I’d love to have a hot drink and actually drink it at home. If I’m home I usually forget it or am sidetracked by a little monster.
Sometimes these hot cup of tea strategies work, but not always. Baby brain has a lot to answer for, microwaved tea just isn’t the same. Nevermind usually I have to microwave it 5 times before I remember a) it’s still in the microwave, or b) have forgotten it on the side again.
3. Leave the house in less than half an hour…
Seriously, how do they time their poonami’s so well? How? Just how? And don’t get me started on their ability to demand more milk (by demand I mean scream the street down)? Oh, and despite being organised, I always have to go back, I’ll forget the milk on the Perfect Prep, leave the changing bag/keys/nappy/shopping bags/jacket/cardi in the house, and of course forget I needed the toilet for the last hour…
Even as a toddler, H still manages to time her poos with us leaving the house. Today I was really half an hour early, and she waited til 5 minutes before we were leaving to poo. I then had to catch her (giggling monster) and try to get her to stay on the changing mat. It’s just plain and simple, NOT a simple task. And, don’t get me started on the toddler tantrums. Car and seats and pushchairs can be such a nightmare. I have to start to leave the house 20 minutes before we need to leave to allow for the 20 minute tantrum. We’re still late though, sorry peeps!
4. Have a decent shower… A long shower, without an audience…. Ok, just be able to wash my hair!
A nice long hot shower, without an audience, without singing every nursery rhyme I can think of and doing a dance. A shower without the baby monitor on, or playing peekaboo round the side, or running after an escaping toddler… Ahhhh bliss. Oh, and hence I love weekends.
5. Have a meal without having to clean the entire room, bath baby and change my clothes again?
Some days it’s the walls, the carpet, the high-chair, me, the baby, and then a trail of debris between the dining room through the kitchen, hall, stairs, landing and up to the bath. I’m orange, baby is orange and the entire dining room no longer grey, it’s bright stain-tastic ORANGE. Why can’t baby food or even BLW foods be less orange or just less messy? Why is baby’s favourite foods spag bol, broccoli, and pasta in tomato (& hidden veg) sauce, never mind grapes which I cut into teeny tiny pieces after all the horror stories, and of course spinach!
Every single one of them are foods which do not clean easily and crucially, foods which can be ground into wee teeny-tiny teensy-weensy pieces, right into the carpet fibre, right into the groves in our lovely table. I must admit this one is getting better now H is 16 months, but the mess is ingrained in my memory, and well I’m quite sure it’s just permanantly in her hair, it’s just so long. Maybe that’s why it sometimes looks blond…
I’m sure I’ve missed a few points, like sleep deprivation, but come on, that’s a given when you fall pregnant… It’s well known, it’s just the sheer scale of zombie-ness no one can ever imagine!
Did I miss anything major?
Read previous issues in the #MyFiveThings series here.