When you find out you are pregnant, you have so many ideas in your head of what your family life will look like… Personally I imagined strolling down the sea front in the glorious sunshine pushing a beautiful pram with a pair of massive boobies (I thought they would just appear after birth) with my long luscious locks blowing in the wind…. I would go to the gym then go shopping and finally head home to my house that looks like something out of “Cribs” because I have so much time on my hands.
In reality picture this… your pushing your pram down the seafront against the wind, you’re wearing the only clothes that you have left that don’t have sick or poo on, your boobs replicate empty socks, your hair is slick back in a greasy bun on your head because you haven’t had a chance to wash it yet this week. You bump in to people when you are out and they are constantly asking “Are you not well…?” or commenting “you don’t look well…” you want to respond with two words starting with the letters “F” and “O” but instead you just smile and agree that you are feeling a little under the weather.
You then have a word with yourself all the way home about how you really need to start making an effort….. You don’t actually know what a gym is anymore and shopping …ahhh well shopping is just a distant memory from when you actually had money…. You head home to your house and it is in that much of a mess that you wouldn’t even notice if it had been burgled whilst you were out.
I didn’t realise how trying having a baby would actually be. What you considered once “Normal” becomes an added bonus… things like .. enjoying a hot coffee, having a shower and even shaving your legs and if anything…. it certainly does make you appreciate the once “normal” things a little more.
Here are 10 things that you will miss about being an independent woman;
1. That coffee with a friend turning in to a messy night out
That phone call on a Saturday to go out for a “coffee”. The type of coffee that turns in to 2 bottles of wine, shots all round and some killer dance moves on the dance floor. Well… this can’t happen anymore and coffee just means a 15-minute COFFEE before your bundle of joy kicks off!!
2. Bed days
Those days where you would just decide that you couldn’t be bothered getting up and dressed and you would just stay in bed all day watching films and eating your body weight in chocolate. The furthest you walk all day is downstairs to collect your takeaway and then take it back to bed. Now you have a baby who requires constant attention and entertaining even when you don’t feel like it.
3. Last minute plans
You fancy going out to the cinema tonight? Well think again. Plans are made weeks in advance… unless you’re lucky enough to live with a nanny.
4. The takeaway run
You just fancy a takeaway… so you used to just get in the car and go … but no… not now… now you have to plan a military mission just to get you and your baby safely out the house. You go in to the local Chinese and the baby has to come…. Then you collect your huge takeaway… how do you carry the baby aswell? D’ohhhh!!!!!
5. Sleeping through the night
Sleeping for a full night seems like a distant memory. Even though your baby has finally slept through… you still find yourself waking up and checking the monitor to make sure they are still breathing. Even once you know they are ok, you spend the rest of the night worrying about pretty much everything you no longer have time to worry about in the day.
6. Binge watching a series
Remember those days of putting a new series on and loving it so much that you watch 5 episodes in a row?? Well those days are long gone and they just don’t happen anymore. You are lucky if you can keep your eyes open through your tea let alone a whole episode of “Homeland”.
7. Having sex wherever you want
Having sex wherever and whenever you want isn’t possible anymore… You try to be spontaneous and sexy when the baby is in bed but then the whiff of baby sick or the nappy bin and the squeaky toy you lie on just ruins the moment.
Organising dates with your other half is so difficult now, you end up using your babysitters for friends and family birthdays which means that actually getting alone time together is so much harder than you imagined.
Remember those days that you would just enjoy silence… after a busy day you could come home, put your feet up and enjoy a coffee in silence or read a book… Silence becomes a time of worry instead of a time of relaxing.
10. Visiting the bathroom … alone
You never realised that time alone having a wee was so precious…. Now you do your toilet trips with a regular partner or if not you wee as quick as humanly possible.
No matter how hard it is you wouldn’t trade that toothless grin you get for the world … If anything becoming a parent makes you realise what life is really about.
Lots of love Carla XOXO
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