15 ways to feel like you’re winning as a mum (even if you might not be!)

For the most part, us mums like to sort of torture ourselves. For some reason unknown to us all, we can’t seem to help beating ourselves over the head with the mum guilt stick, the you’ve effed up stick or the what the hell am I doing???! stick. And so for the days when it feels all too much, what if we had a quick win we could call on? Something that made us feel better even if it’s been a s*** day? So I called on fellow mum bloggers to share what makes them feel like they’re winning as a mum…even when they suspect they really might not be; because remember – you’ve got to fake it until you can make it!

Do your hair and make up

Anyone who turns up to a baby group or school run with styled hair and make up I think must be amazingly on top of it. I occasionally try and copy them! – Counting to Ten 

Own the prep the night before

Going to bed with the lunchbox made and clothes laid out ready for nursery. I don’t know why but it makes me ridiculously pleased with my own parenting skills (that and stops my husband dressing him like a fashion reject!) – Devon Mama 

Savour those sweet words

When my daughter hugs me tight and says “Love you mama. Nunnight. ” every night no matter what has happened that day. Makes me feel I’m doing something right even in bad days. – Mummy In a Tutu 

Bust out the bath and prosecco

When you have one of those afternoons where you manage to clean, cook AND the toddler eats all his dinner! Reward self with bath….. and prosecco! – Beauty Baby and Me 

Give yourself a laundry pat on the back

Seeing washing drying on the line. I don’t know why but I get a huge sense of satisfaction from it. – And Another Ten Things 

Know it’s the little things…

When there is milk in the fridge in the morning for tea/coffee/cereal – makes me feel like a legend with her sh*t together! – Twinderelmo.co.uk

Feel the appreciation

When you remember a surprising amount from your English lit A level and just as fate would have it your teen daughter is doing the same text so you can help her with her own A levels. This morning in the car Holly said ” I love you mama, thank you for helping me and for giving up work this week to spend time with me making mind maps. I love you” I might have cried a bit. – Amy Treasure 

Keep the front room clean (even if the rest is a sess pit)

I always keep my front room (that you can see from the front door) spotless. That way when anyone knocks on or calls round, as long as I can contain them to the front room they will never know the devastation that lies within!!  – Five Little Doves

Share the pain

Talk to other mums and dads and you’ll soon realise that actually you are winning! – My Boys Club  

Turn those tantrums around

When I manage to turn a tantrum around without bribery or giving in, that makes me feel like I’m winning. At this age (2.5 yrs) it’s so easy to give in for an easy life, but I know in the long run it’s the worst thing I can do. Often taking a deep breath (to remind myself to be patient) and then spending time at her level rather than being half-distracted is enough to improve her behaviour. – Refined Prose 

Celebrate those favourite moments

We’ve done ‘favourite moment of the day’ at bedtime tuck in ever since the eldest was 3. She’s about to turn 13, an age where most of her peers’ mums are telling me they can’t get a hug or polite word out of their child. Yet she still loves doing favourite moment of the day and always insists on hearing on mine too. Best of all: when we do it after family Sunday and the answer is often: “the whole day was my favourite moment mummy”. – Absolutely Prabulous 

Feel the mama love

When my four year old says this has been the best day ever mummy even if it really wasn’t that great lol, when I get a kiss and a hug every night too after bed time stories and I’m walking down the stairs to a I love you more war, I love you a zillion mummy, I win. Melts me and makes me so proud even if I have had a really Sh*& day I go to bed a happy mama. – Paige’s Preference 

Feed them right

I always feel better when I know they’ve eaten well. I love making healthier food swaps and not all of them are gratefully received but when my children really take to a new healthy food it leaves me feeling proud that we all tried it. My mission is to reduce their sugar intake and gradually I’m seeing them being really receptive to it which is a huge win for me. It’s a bonus that they’re bouncing off the walls less too! – The Mother Diaries 

Work the slow cooker

I feel like I’m winning as a mother every time I get a meal in the slow cooker by 9am. Whatever I do that day or however badly the rest of the day goes, I know we will have a nutritious hot home cooked meal at the end of the day. And I don’t have to try cook during the witching hour when the kids are their worst. Win win. – Nomi Palony 

Know you are enough

Reminding myself that I’m trying my best. And seeing my kids together happy & looked after. – Cuddle Fairy 

What makes you feel like you’re winning as a mum? Do share in a comment below.

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28 comments

  1. Thank you so much for including mine Talya. I love this post, I need to print this out and stick it on my fridge to remind myself how to wing this parenting lark!

  2. Thanks to Laura’s idea I now know where I’ve been going wrong. I’ve been trying to keep the whole house tidy. I’m now just going to focus on the living room. Boom. #coolmumclub

  3. Couldn’t agree more! I usually go to school in jeans and a hoodie, makeup free. But, if I’m going somewhere straight after and I’ve in makeup and have nice hair I start the day feeling much better! I also like an early morning run because then I’m forced to shower and get dressed after and can’t sit about in my pjs all morning! #coolmumclub

  4. Yes! Especially getting the stuff out for nursery the night before. I’m mumming it then, haha. When I’ve done the washing I feel like I’m winning for about 5 minutes before something finds it’s way into the basket! #CoolMumClub

  5. I feel like I am winning as a mum when I am playing with Cygnet and his cars down by the river. He loves it and I can congratulate myself for having the courage to leave the admin, cleaning, work, social media and actually live in the moment. Pen x #coolmumclub

  6. This is lovely. Great word of advice to follow. I like the favourite part of the day one. I do this with my daughter sometimes, we should make it a daily thing! X

  7. This is all so true. I do thirty minutes of cleaning a day after work – wipe down the kitchen, bathroom, make the beds and whizz through the living room – with a full face of makeup on. That means if we have any unexpected visitors, no one gets a nasty surprise! Including me. Winning!!!

  8. This is brilliant-and most of it I actually do-so I’m giving myself a massive pat on the back for feeling like I’m winning! Especially the front room one-it’s always lovely and tidy, when the rest of the house looks like a hole!

    #coolmumclub

  9. I am a huge advocate of doing hair and make up in the morning. I feel so much better by doing it, more human and a little more ready for the day. I have never been good at lounging around. I love the idea of keeping the front room clean.
    #coolmumclub

  10. Keeping the front room clean is genius! I need to try that #coolmumclub

  11. This is such a lovely feel good article! I’m so stealing fav moment of the day for my boys, hopefully they will have one. To be honest, I think I’m pretty much winning if I manage to keep my children alive for the day, if I manage to throw in some crafts then I’m basically award worthy!

  12. Loving these tips, especially Laura Doves – my clear (ish) living room keeps me sane!

    Think this lot deserve a spot in the #coolmumclub rules of life!

    Sending some #coolmumclub love your way (where is everyone though ha ha) x

  13. Loved this! It made me feel just that little bit less shit about myself and my parenting skills, or lack thereof! Love the idea of the fave moment of the day, going to try to start that, lovely way to focus on the positives if it’s been a particularly ‘challenging’ day x #coolmumclub

  14. Oh what a totally wonderful heartwarming post! Amy’s one was lovely as was Prab’s. Oh and prep the night before, prosecco and bathtime, front room tidy – all wins in my view!! #CoolMumClub

  15. These are all brilliant. For me it’s the ‘I love you mummy’ moments and when I’ve had a bad day and come downstairs after putting the youngest to bed to find my son has tidied the toys away and set me up a seat with cushions and a blanket, so sweet.
    #coolmumclub

  16. I try to do what Laura does but the kids follow me and mess it up as soon as I’ve tidied it. I’ve tried taking a room each day too but even with those they do the same. #coolmumclub

  17. Getting out the house with a face of make up and semi respectable hair always makes me feel a little better and like I am starting the day with a #win, its usually down hill from there though… #coolmumclub

  18. I love these so much! Some really handy tips thrown in here too. From the sounds of it, I’m also sometimes winning at motherhood! #coolmumclub

  19. Ahh! These are great and some top tips that I’m going to take on board to make myself feel like I’m winning! I like the favourite moments one and I agree that I always feel like I’m winning when I’ve got the dinner in the slow cooker in the morning! Thanks for hosting #CoolMumClub x

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