Becoming a parent: How to prepare for the arrival of your first child

becoming a parent
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You have an idea of how life is going to change when your baby is born and on becoming a parent, but the reality is always different than you imagine. However, it’s important to do your best to get as many things in place as possible ahead of time. This can feel a little bit like running on a treadmill or a race that you can’t win–there will always be things left undone, but all of the points below are worth considering before becoming a parent and bringing your first child into this world.

Let Go

It’s hard, but one of the most important things that you need to do is let go. Much of what is ahead of you is out of your control, and learning to roll with uncertainty will serve you well. No one is the perfect parent, and you don’t need to be to bring up a happy, healthy loving child. Accept that you will make mistakes, realize that you can’t prepare for everything and plan for everything you do to take much longer than you expect once the baby arrives.

Save Your Money

Babies don’t necessarily have to be expensive, but you want to be prepared in case of an emergency, so this is a great time to get your finances in order. Look at what is incoming and outgoing, and consider making a budget. Try to find some places to cut expenses, and put that money away into a savings account if you don’t already have an emergency fund. If you do have several months of emergency savings, consider investing it. There are many different ways to lower your expenses. Planning your meals before you go to the store and restricting your online shopping can reduce impulse buying. If you have student loans, consider refinancing them into a new loan that can offer lower monthly payments that you can take advantage of.

Build Your Support Network

Some of your relationships will change on becoming a parent – something we all experience. You may find yourself growing apart from some people you were close to, but new people will come into your life as well. You can start taking care of your mental health and building that support network before your baby is born, looking for prenatal exercise classes, or other opportunities to meet mothers-to-be. If your parents or other family members are interested in helping out with child care, you’re ahead of the game, but you can’t automatically expect this level of support. However, your family may still be interested in doing some babysitting. Talk to your partner about how you might divide duties in the first few weeks.

Prepare Your Environment

What are the things you are going to need in those first weeks? It’s a good idea to try to do some batch cooking and freeze food so that you can just heat up meals, but be sure that it is food you can eat with one hand since you may be holding your baby. Stock up on diapers and other items so that you don’t have to run out in the middle of the night–or while sleep deprived in the middle of the day–to get them. Make sure you have plenty of comfortable clothes to wear.

Think About The Kind Of Parent You Want To Be

When we have our first child, there can be so much emphasis on “having the baby” that we may not actually take the time to think about the kind of parent we want to be. Do you want to be an eco warrior that only uses eco-friendly baby wipes and reusable nappies? Do you want to subscribe to a certain type of parenting i.e. gentle/positive/calm parenting? It’s important to think about what values matter to you as a parent and what kind of family and values system you want to create as a parent.

Let Go

It’s hard, but one of the most important things that you need to do on becoming a parent is to let go. Much of what is ahead of you is out of your control, and learning to roll with uncertainty will serve you well. No one is the perfect parent, and you don’t need to be to bring up a happy, healthy loving child. Accept that you will make mistakes, realize that you can’t prepare for everything and plan for everything you do to take much longer than you expect once the baby arrives.

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