This, the 4th issue of the #beingamother project sees the lovely Claire of Life Love and Dirty Dishes, who likes to tickle toes as well as her readers with the amusing side of parenting, not forgetting some soppy bits in-between. Fitting then, that her entry on the #beingamother project is a perfect combination of the two. So read on for some heart warming, entertaining observations on what motherhood means to her…
When I was a little girl I had a doll called Amy. I loved her. Long after the Care Bears and Barbie Dolls had disappeared from my room and my walls became adorned with pictures of Jason Donovan, Amy remained. Admittedly she spent most of her time sitting on top of my wardrobe but I couldn’t part with her. I always knew that I wanted to be a mother. But Amy couldn’t prepare me for being a mother. Nothing could.
It starts gradually. The excitement and relief when the pregnancy test is positive. The worry that everything will be OK. The first rush of love when you see your baby on the sonogram. The first feeling of fear that you are not going to be able to do this. The anticipation when you buy your first tiny teeny sleepsuits. The elation the first time you feel your baby kick. The guilt when you moan about the nausea and the backache and the peeing every two friggin’ minutes. Pregnancy gives you a whole host of emotions you have never felt before but will remain with you for the rest of your live.
When the baby arrives motherhood bowls you over, it overwhelms you. Quite frankly, at first it knocks the stuffing right out of you. But before you know it your precious beautiful bundle that you have absolutely no idea what to do with is starting school. And you’ll wonder how it happened so fast. And your life before becoming a mother will seem like a lifetime ago.
What does being a mother mean to me?
Being a mother is love like you have never known. It’s feeling someone else’s pain as your own. It’s a primeval instinct to protect.
Being a mother is knowing every park in a 5 mile radius of your home and which shops have toilet facilities.
Being a mother is snuggles on the sofa watching Disney movies.
Being a mother is a state of constant change. It’s getting into a routine and by the time you have adjusted the routine changes again.
Being a mother is becoming very well acquainted with stain removal products.
Being a mother is a complete juxtaposition of feelings. It’s longing for the baby to take a nap, and missing them as soon as they do.
Being a mother is finding a new you, through the advise, the judgement and the criticism, and learning to be confident in the decisions you make.
Being a mother is a lesson in never being smug. One day your child might recite the alphabet beautifully to an admiring audience. The next they will be throwing food around the supermarket and having a very public meltdown where the audience will not be so impressed.
Being a mother is googling what chicken pox looks like.
Being a mother is exhaustion like you’ve never known, but discovering when you think you have nothing left to give, you do.
Being a mother is always finding raisins in the bottom of your handbag.
Being a mother is pride and celebration in milestones and achievements big and small. It’s cheering out loud and dancing when a small person does a wee wee on a potty. It’s crying in the park because Daddy let go of the saddle and they rode their bike by themselves.
Being a mother is late night discussions with the husband on are we making the right decisions.
Being a mother is knowing someone else better than you know yourself.
Being a mother is accepting you can’t be perfect. There are days when you wake up and your bucket of patience hasn’t fully replenished over night, and there’s no where near enough to get you through the day. You shout more than you should, you don’t listen enough, but you get through it.
Being a mother is never finding the bottom of the laundry basket.
Being a mother is learning from your mistakes. Like leaving the house without a change-bag the day your baby projectile vomits all over you and you have to drive home in your bra.
Being a mother is dancing round the kitchen and having impromptu discos wearing cow-boy hats.
Being a mother is never having any privacy in your life again. ever. Whether they are barging in on you shaving your bikini line, or telling the neighbours exactly what you said to Daddy about them.
Being a mother is feeling heartbreak when the small people are poorly. But having the greatest privilege in the world of being the one who can make things better. Poorly cuddles are precious things.
Being a mother is picnics in the garden on sunny days.
Being a mother is owning lots of Ikea storage solutions and always having a pile of stuff to take to the charity shop.
Being a mother is having a To-Do list that never gets completed.
Being a mother is approaching trampolines with extreme caution. No matter how many bloody pelvic floor exercises you did.
Being a mother is singing nursery rhymes in public places to stop your baby from crying. It’s like karaoke with crap songs and no alcohol.
Being a mother is marveling at how big and grown up they have gotten and wondering how the hell it happened so fast.
Being a mother is peeking in on them sleeping soundly in their beds and realising just how small they still are.
Being a mother is experiencing pain like no other when you step on Lego. Barefoot.
Being a mother is never being able to watch anything on TV remotely sad without being a blubbering wreck.
Being a mother is thinking nothing of wiping snot from your child’s face with your hands.
Being a mother is knowing you’ve really earned that glass of wine.
Being a mother is rediscovering the joy of colouring in, and trying really hard not to get annoyed with the small people when they go over the lines or colour the sand in green.
Being a mother is falling asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow.
Being a mother is guilt over everything. It’s constantly questioning if you are doing the right thing and a constant battle to get them to eat vegetables.
Being a mother is knowing the exact tickle spot to get the best giggles.
Being a mother is knowing every presenter on Cbeebies and whether they have kids or not because you’ve googled them whilst watching the same episode of Charlie and Lola for the 50th time.
Being a mother is feeling pride so overwhelming you feel you might actually burst.
Being a mother is falling in love all over again with your husband when you see him as a father.
Being a mother is having to eat chocolate in secret. Unless you want to share it.
Being a mother is being projectile vomited on and not batting an eyelid.
On good days being a mother it’s full of smiles and laughter and cuddles, on bad days it’s full of tears and tantrums from both the small people and me. On normal days it’s busy, loud and always unpredictable.
Being a mother is life changing. It is the best thing I have ever done. My greatest achievement my most rewarding job ever.
It is all these things and so many in between.
Motherhood is bigger than me. It’s bigger than all of us. But it’s a wonderful thing that so many of us share in.
Ultimately, it’s all about them. The small people that fill my heart with love, turn my hair grey and drive me a little bit crazy. My world wouldn’t be the same without my two beautiful noisy boys.
If you’d like to find out more about or take part in the #beingamother project read about it here.