OK, I have to admit, while I am not a massive advocate of lying to your child, I am partial to the odd white lie. Nothing major. Usually it involves covering up something someone thoughtless someone else has done to make things seem a little better, although of course I know the negatives of parents lying. Because while I do overall believe in telling the truth, I think there are some things that preschoolers just don’t need to hear unless you want their brains to fall out of their ears.
And then there is the question of how to get your sproglet to their preschooler vaccinations. Clearly, telling the truth would mean getting absolutely nowhere near the doctor’s surgery. And so the little white lie that spilled out of my mouth which I will regret forever more was that we were just going to the doctor’s for a routine check up. Which crushingly, my daughter was actually looking forward for. God help her.
And then we walked into the room, and the truth suddenly dawned on her, as within a second, the word vaccination filled the room like a horrible and heavy led balloon.
The silence, which was deafening, was followed by the most soul destroying desperate screaming you had ever heard. Being a “mum”, of course…it was my job to restrain my child who now seemed to be on the verge of spontaneously combusting she was having such a god almighty paddy….the sort that makes under toddler tantrum seem like child’s play.
And so I obliged, and while knowing that I was doing was was the right thing, I couldn’t help feeling like an absolute traitor. And her eyes said it all – that I had hurt her so deeply with my big old fat hairy lie – as they pleaded with me desperately I finally managed to get her in a double arm lock, pinning her fighting legs down with the hands at the same time, and struggling with the notion that at that moment, my daughter not only felt under attack, but also that I was basically an accomplice in it. Kill me now.
This was definitely not a high point in my mum career. And just when I thought things couldn’t sink any lower, I forced the leftover Christmas chocolate which I had secretly stashed into my bag for the inevitable (yes, we’re still going through them!), which was the most horridly mum guilt laden emotional crutch it felt like she would ever know.
Thankfully, preschoolers are incredibly forgiving and move on fast, but I will never be able to unsee that look in her eyes which bore right into my soul. I’m sorry little E. But how else was I supposed to get you to the doctor’s otherwise?
Have you ever told a lie to your children which you regretted to your core? Do share in a comment below.
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