Ah toddlers, you gotta love them and their annoying toddler behaviour….no sooner have they discovered the beautiful power of language do they discover their wonderful ability to exert control, manipulate and annoy to the extreme using that very power.
I think that with many of the below most annoying catch phrases that I’m about to share, it is not so much the content, but more the delivery both in terms of volume, intensity, tenacity, inappropriateness, nonsensicalness and extreme repetition that make them just so toe-curlingly annoying.
Is your toddler annoying you? Let me share with you the most annoying toddler catchphrases that prevail in our (and I’m damn sure your) house and see if we can find some common ground here.
1. NO NO NO !!!!!!!
A bajillion, gazillion times a day, whenever you try to do anything, or go anywhere. Enough said.
2. MORE! MORE!
Shouted caveman style whilst banging something on the table for good effect. Errr…would you like me to peel you a grape and fan you now?
3. I need…I need…
Listen up, buddy, I hate to break this to you but you will not die if you don’t do it yourself, have another yogurt or get to ride on your scooter. Perhaps merely want? Just sayin’,
4. Me do it…
The pram, the car seat, the shoes, the putting the toilet seat on the toilet, the putting the toothpaste on the toothbrush (cue explosion!), the zipping up the coat which infuriates you so badly, the turning on the lights like you were being treated for OCD. God, will we ever leave the house?
What’s mine is mine, what’s yours is mine, what’s his is mine and what’s hers is mine…basically the whole world is mine when you’re a toddler. Selfish to the max.
6. Wobble wobble (while grabbing boob or bum)
Yup, you just know how to make a mama feel good about herself eh?
7. I not like it!
I not like this today, I not like that tomorrow, I not like the thing I loved so badly a minute ago, and I certainly not like the food you just put down before me…even though I haven’t even tasted it!
8. You do it!
Come here, sit down, push me, roll over, beg…whatever it is…just…YOU DO IT!
9. I can’t do it!
Don’t dare to help them do anything until you hear this green light phrase, which often appears even when they have not even tried!
10. What’s that?
OK not so much wrong with this phrase apart from it is said a zillion times in succession about every single thing they see. Yes I know they are learning but pleassssssse can someone give a mama a break?!!!
OK so the reason we have a weird number 11 here is that when I penned this, my little girl had not caught on to the whyyyyy? annoyance but now she is there I can officially add it to this list! Woop woop…errrrr…or maybe not!
OK now breathe………
What is your most annoying toddler catch phrases bounded about in your house? One of these or perhaps one that hasn’t made it onto this list?