You know what the say – never assume because it makes an ass out of you and me, but when it comes to mums, it just seems we love to assume and misconceive. Grrrrrrr. As annoying as it is, it is fact of life, and so here I join forces with fellow parenting bloggers in a round up of 10 common misconceptions made about mums….
MISCONCEPTION #1: THAT MUMS JUST SIT AROUND
That when they go on play dates with their friends and their children, they just sit around eating cake and drinking tea and not looking after the children . – Beauties And The Bibs
MISCONCEPTION #2: THAT ALL MUMS HAVE BABY BRAINS
That all we’re capable of talking about is our babies or that we’ve got ‘baby brain’. Errr, I had a brain before I had children, I still have one now! – Devon Mama
MISCONCEPTION #3: THAT ALL MUMS ARE GOOD MUMS
Errrrrr……no. If only this were true! – Wave to Mummy
MISCONCEPTION #4: THAT MATERNITY LEAVE IS A HOLIDAY
Yes, we may not be sitting at a desk all day. But I can assure you, looking after a child 24 hours a day is no mean feat – chances are we can’t tell you the last time we’ve had a warm meal, I certainly don’t spend all day on coffee dates, and watching Jeremy Kyle reruns is nowhere near as fun as it looks.- Life With Boys
MISCONCEPTION #5: THAT IT’S BECAUSE WE ARE HORMONAL
There’s sometimes the undertone of not taking mums seriously because they’re hormonal – due to being on their period, or being pregnant, or going through the 4th trimester, or not being able to handle toddler tantrums. Being hormonal, if at all, doesn’t reduce the validity of our feelings, views, and concerns. – Adventures of a Novice Mum
MISCONCEPTION #6: THAT ALL MUMS HAVE IT ALL UNDER CONTROL
…and that we do not want to sit in a corner screaming and crying because life is so hard when people constantly want something from you and you feel like you can not live up to everyone high standards. – Cups of Charlotte
MISCONCEPTION #7: THAT ALL MUMS ARE BABY MAKING MACHINES
…and that we’re going to have another child. I was told ‘see you in a year’ when I left the maternity ward with my first, and even now after having a baby a mere six months ago I’m already being asked if I want more, when my next is, or worse will I ‘try for a girl’. We are not baby making machines. – Babies and Beauty
MISCONCEPTION #8: THAT BEING A WORKING MUM IS A DODDLE
…and that being a working mum means you get a break! I think it’s one of those cases of the grass always being greener on the other side. I can’t remember the last time I got ten minutes to myself without needing to do work/ parenting/ seemingly parenting my boss/ housework etc! – Better Together Home
MISCONCEPTION #9: THAT MUMS ENJOY IT ALL THE TIME
Yes we do, mostly. But Just not after the 100th time of wheels on the bus) Spending 24/7 with a toddler is mind numbing at times. …- Dancing Dandelions
MISCONCEPTION #10: THAT BEING A MUM COMES NATURALLY
…and that we just know how to be mums before we have had any experience of it, because we don’t! – Mummy and Moose
Sound familiar? What other common misconceptions about mums would you add to this life? Do leave a comment and share below.
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So true. Glad this post is out in the open… and people realise that these are nothing more than MISCONCEPTIONS. Motherhood is bliss, yes, but it is no walk in the park. It is hard work, mind-numbing and not so rewarding (except for the cuddles and kisses!!!)
#coolmumclub
My main teeth grinder is that All SAHM’S are on benefits and spend all day watching Jeremy Kyle! (even though he is one of my guilty pleasures!) 😉 and did you know we also take our children to school wearing our pjs!
#coolmumclub
Yes Yes and Yes again! It drives me insane that people think it’s a doddle full of coffee mornings and watching Holly and Phil! I write this as my child is climbing all over me, my tea is of course going cold and the cat is having a meltdown! Motherhood – not easy! xxx #coolmumclub
Oh so true! (although I had baby brain before I had a baby, ha!) The mums do nothing all day one gets me, and don’t get me started on maternity leave holidays. I read an article that argued women who hadn’t had children should be entitled to 9 months paid maternity leave. Yeah we’d all like 9 months paid to do whatever but I’ve been kind busy raising a human and recovering from surgery! I’d better stop…. #CoolMumClub
I completely agree with all of these. There are so many misconceptions that being a mum is a doddle when its anything but! Thanks for hosting #coolmumclub
Oh God, so true! Definately true that people think that all mum’s do is go on play dates and eat cake and drink tea! Drives me nuts! X #coolmumclub
I’ve heard all this misconceptions and so glad you’ve written a post on this! I’ll def share it around! To make people see there’s so much more to being a mom than cakes and play dates and staying home…;) #coolmumclub
This is so true. In particular, people keep asking me when I’m having the next one. Give me 5 minutes! #coolmumclub
All so true! The maternity leave holiday drives me mad. I work from home now. People say things like “you might go back to work one day”…er I do work!! Even husband, the other day we had a day off together, spent at home, which is rare, we are normally busy. He said “it’s been lovely to have a day doing nothing” I’d literally worked for about 8 hours! #coolmumclub
Honestly, I don’t know anybody who thinks these things. Not 1 single person has ever indicated to me that they might consider maternity leave a holiday. Sorry, this just doesn’t jive in my experience.
Oh I love this…. I get the “Oh you have five days off now” comment after I’m half dead having just worked 21 hours in two days… while wrestling my toddler that I know will give me hell for the next five days. Grrrr! #coolmumclub
These all resonate with me! Children are a joy and a delight. But they are also draining, unrelenting and needy. Whatever structure your life takes, it has it’s ups and downs just like everyone else. And usually on less sleep! #CoolMumClub
The baby machine part is true! I get asked repeatedly when am I going to get the ridiculous idea of having only one child out of my head and plan for another one! Haha.
#coolmumclub
Being a mum totally doesn’t come naturally to me, I’m very selfish. Someone once said I was an ‘earth mother’ and I was just like…seriously? Do you know me at all? #coolmumclub
Yes to all 10! I’d like to add the misconception that Mum’s have ‘loads of time’ like we have loads of time to bake and cook from scratch or we can do the thing for the PTA because we’re only at home looking after the youngest, or we can take an hour long phone call from our own Mum (“Just a quick call” righto mother).
WE DON’T EVEN HAVE TIME TO PEE PEOPLE! #coolmumclub
err – #CoolMumClub
#babybrain!!! 🙂
I have to say I’m guilty of using #2 to my advantage when it suits me! 🙂 #BloggerClubUK
“At least you get naptime to just chill out” Errrr, no! That short hour (if we’re lucky) is used to inhale a luke-warm lunch, make and forget about a coffee, clear 3/4 of the kids food off the kitchen floor, wash up, attempt to hang out the washing, start thinking about activities for the afternoon, and then THEY’RE AWAKE! Love this #CoolMumClub
Great post!
As mum’s we are expected to hear our children wake in the night, apparently it’s a natural instinct. Definitely not the case for me LOL! My hubby used to hear them first and would have to wake me to go sort them! Whoops!
Now I hear everything unfortunately!
#coolmumclub
This is so true! Motherhood is blooming hard work as it tests everything you are and then some. (Not that I’d want to change it, just that it’s hard people!)
Great list. The first one is my favourite. I often encounter people who think I do nothing all day. Just sit around watching tv with tonnes of time on my hands and not a care in the world. #coolmumclub
Oh my word I actually spat my coffee out reading that first one! Arghhhhh! Though I am hard pushed to actually work out what I have done some days – hours and hours of being a mum bit sometimes zero to show for it! Though I am certain you don’t have that problem xx #CoolMumClub
I am a SAHM- so ya know…I pretty uch lay around eating potato chips all day long. 😉
These are spot on darling.
#coolmumsclub
Let me tell you being a full time working mum is certainly NOT easy so I totally agree with that one! At first it is a nice break from just being ‘Mum’ but after a while you realise that your break from the stresses at home is actually a job. Thats not really a relaxing break at all… by any stretch of the imagination! Also… TOTALLY relate to not having everything so seemingly under control. Everyone always says I deal with everything so well (my partner would tell you the opposite bless him as he always bears the brunt of my stress!) but I am mostly screaming inside when the little man plays up! #coolmumclub
Does sitting in the car count as sitting around? Honestly, you and I don’t live that far apart but it’s virtually impossible with all the mum stuff going on to think about ‘grabbing a coffee and having a sit’!! I kinda wish #3 was true though – I tend to think that way.. xxxx Hope you are good. #coolmumclub
Yes, this all sounds familiar! It’s a lot harder being a Mum than people realise, that’s for sure! #CoolMumClub
Yes to all of these! What would I add? That all Mums are boring and mumsy… Not on my watch! 😉 sending #coolmumclub high five to you partner! Xx
“Stupidity is a talent for misconception” Edgar Allan Poe
This post will resonate with many!
Alison x #coolmumclub
Having your cake and eating it. God I hate that. Having to work to pay the bills but wanting to spend time with your kids, do drop-offs and pickups, being around for tea time, working part-time etc etc
I just want to be the best parent I can be and finding the balance between work and home is such a challenge. #coolmumclub
I hated when hubby joked that maternity leave was an extended holiday! and dont get me started on the working mums get a break:
I wake at 6, on the bus by 7, working half 8 til 6 with a 45 minute break which i blog. then blog on the bus home. cook dinner and then blog more until bedtime. There is no break and it gets so exhausting! #coolmumclub
Yep I can relate to all 10 points. And what is it about mum’s that people feel you want to hear their advice on how to bring up YOUR child- err no we don’t! We just want to muddle through by ourselves thanks! xx
Yes to all of these! Fab post! #coolmumclub
ha ha, I have experienced every single one of these over the last (almost) 8 years. You’d think it would be like water off a ducks back by now but they still drive me crazy … or maybe that’s just the kids
#Coolmumclub
All too familiar! Plus I think you just need to watch Jeremy Kyle for 5 minutes (if you can bare it) to see not all mums are good mums. It is hard and we all make mistakes. I find people assume I’m tired because my daughters kept me up at night, often its simply because I am a busy person. I have a life outside of them…. sort of 😉
#coolmumclub
So familiar, although for me I was back at the maternity hospital within a year, and the following year too! Haha! #coolmumclub
Thanks for all the comments everyone – well seeing as we are all in agreement maybe we should print this out and put a flyer through everyone’s door what do you think lol? xoxo
Nothing should be taken for granted with motherhood! We’re all mums but all on our own paths, we don’t fit into neat little peg holes no one misconception should tarnish the whole lot of us!! Although baby brain is a given with me!!!#coolmumclub
Christ there are hundreds of misconceptions regarding Motherhood and often it angers me. Good post x
YES to all of this! It does my head in when people think I do nothing all day and I have a easy life because I don’t work..parenting is so hard! If people would stop filling expectant mums heads with dreams of coffee dates and a ‘holiday’ of maternity leave then maybe the reality wouldn’t come as such a shock to lots of us. Xx #coolmumclub
The food getting cold stands out to me the most. Lovely to read comments from bloggers I’ve not heard from before as well as those I have. May have to check some of these out. #coolmumclub
Totally agree with al of these especially on being asked when you’re having another – I have an almost 6 year old and still get asked!
Sorry forgot to add #coolmumclub
Brilliant – tells it like it is #coolmumclub
Ah yes the old “Maternity leave is a holiday” one. Boils my piss. Especially when said by a man, who after having the kids for one afternoon, complains about what a hard day they’ve had. All the other misconceptions you pointed out are pretty accurate too but it was the maternity leave one that particulary stood out for me.
Thanks for hosting #coolmumclub
[…] face it, as a mum, there can be nothing more dreamy in life than conjuring up scenes of you lounging around in a […]
Yes to all of these! Especially the one about thinking motherhood is all about play dates and drinking endless cups of tea and just sitting around. #coolmumclub
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