Raising kids and keeping your relationship strong takes a lot of effort. Great relationships don’t just happen; both people have to work on it. But as we all know…when time and money are tight, it’s hard to prioritize your spouse but that’s even more reason to do it.
Here are some everyday ways to keep that connection with your significant other strong:
Schedule time together
Don’t just wish you had the time – make it happen. It can be as simple as enjoying a favorite TV show together after the kids go to bed, or more complicated like a date night at least once a month. And set down the phones and tablets when you do it. Technology is great for parents, but not at the expense of real relationships. Set that time in advance though and don’t schedule over it. You need that down time to enjoy each other’s company so make sure you squeeze it in.
Keep it real
We don’t live in a movie. We live in the real world. That means we have to have realistic expectations of our partner (read: adjust your expectations). Communication is also the key to keeping it real and strong relationships are built on effective communication. So keep the lines open! Take regular stock of your relationship and be aware if it is feeling a little lucklustre and needing some maintenance if things are feeling a bit disjointed. Equally it’s important to give each other the space to do and be what they want as an individual.
Keep it fresh
Think back to what first attracted you to your spouse and then revisit it. Maybe it’s an activity you enjoyed back then, or a fave restaurant. Life isn’t always about revisiting the past but finding fresh ways to reignite that spark through things you already love can really improve bonding.
Some couples have a lot in common and some are the definition of opposites attract. Whatever the case with your relationship, find a way to share each other’s hobbies and interests. For us, this has meant me taking any interest in my partner playing poker and even being known to be the dealer on occasions (yes really!), or visiting art galleries together (because that’s my great love). Try to find time for the interests that each of you love and not always be running off to do those activities alone.
Try something new together
The pandemic has been a great catalyst for many people to try something new. One thing my partner and I have recently starting doing together of an evening is sketching. I bought a book that teaches you how to sketch really cool stuff and that was the start of something. Sketching is a great way of boosting your mood which is why we love it so much, but there are so many other things you could try together. Check out this list of new things to try for inspiration.
Give the gift of small unexpected things
Sure there plenty of gifting opportunities throughout the year like Valentine’s Day, birthdays, Father’s Day, an anniversary but you can also gift your partner small unexpected things throughout the year. Whether you decide to gift them a new wallet because you notice their wallet is falling apart, or writing a poem or funny note for them just because you felt like it, or sending them an email that day about all the things you love about them. The small unexpected things they didn’t see coming can often be the most priceless.
Forgive easily
This is something I’ve really had to work on. When you share the same living space and life, it’s easy to get under each other’s skin from time to time. Try not to sweat the small stuff (a daily gratitude practice really helps with this – seriously!). Remember that in the larger picture of your life, the small annoyances of a day don’t really matter. If you truly believe that your partner is the best person for you then don’t allow resentment to build up.
How do you and your spouse find ways to spend time together when life gets hectic? How do you work together to keep on the same track together? Do leave a comment and share.
If you enjoyed this post, please consider supporting this site by buying us a virtual coffee.
It’s the ‘forgive easily’ which we need to work upon.
Thanks for tips, I can definitely relate to this having a 2 year old daughter. It is really important to make time for yourselves, whether it’s just a movie night or catching up without having the Disney channel on in the background.
Love this… its so super important to maintain the fact you are in a couple not just a family and that you are together for a reason! We’ve got most of these down but I definitely need to work on forgiving easily… I certainly let things get under my skin far too easily! <3
[…] Yes, true love is everlasting but it takes work and effort. […]
[…] my husband not able to work, study or even volunteer; frustration and resentment building up in our relationship because we are not allowed to live a normal family life; unable to afford family trips away or buy […]