11 types of school run parents

Ahhhh the school run, the epic zoo-like madness when herds of parents  from all walks of life come together to  chivvy their little darlings as quickly as they can to the school gates in Challenge Anneke-like style. Some school run parents look like they have totally got it together on the school run, while others look like they are totally falling apart.

I can be either or depending on which day it is!

But apparently things are not as clear cut as that. I recently got a little email saying that Channel Mum reckons there are 11 types of modern school run parents…including the clipboard mum, the WhatsApp mum, and even….um…yes the handbag dog mum (hilarious!).

I reckon that most days I’m a good enough/WhatsApp mum. On a weirdly good day I MAY even pass off as an Instagram mum…ummmm…on second thoughts, who am I kidding?!!!!!. One thing I know is that I am definitely NOT that craft mum lol (you should see some of my dire creations!). Which one/s do you identify most with?

The Clipboard Mum

Swapped a high-flying career to be the PTA CEO. Stands by the gates to charm / browbeat other parents into signing up to the PTA board, to run stalls at the school fete, to organise the cakes sales, sew school play costumes and hand over cash for charity runs. Revered and feared. Other mums run when she starts striding over. Most likely to say: “Didn’t you get my email on that?’

The WhatsApp Mum

Always late, always disorganised, depends on the class WhatsApp group for absolutely everything. Usually found WhatsApping at 9pm on a Sunday night to get homework which has to be handed in on Monday morning. Most likely to say: “Sorry I didn’t get that message, can you resend it?”

The Instagram Mum

Arrives polished and preened with three picture-perfect kids. Bouncy hair, dazzling megawatt smile, endless supply of enviable, fashionable new clothes. Snaps a ‘what I wore on the school run selfie’ each day. Most likely to say: “Oh what, this old top / dress / bag? It’s just a little vintage find.”

The Handbag Dog Mum

Carries a small teacup dog in a large and blinging designer bag. Dog gets more love, fuss and after-school treats than the kids. Most likely to say: “My dog is my baby, she’s just soooo cute.”

The Activewear Mum

Always clad in tight Lycra and the latest mesh-panel leggings. Runs to school, jogs on the spot at drop off, and can wait to ‘drop and dump’ so she can get on with her exercise regime. Often runs in packs with other activewear mums. Most likely to say: “Sorry can’t stop, I’m in training today and have got to beat my personal best.”
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The Craft Mum

Always brings in recycling and expertly done homework craft creations. Feared at bake sales for producing handmade, perfectly iced and decorated cupcakes. Wrinkles her nose at your Tesco packed sponge cakes. Usually skips around in Boden tea dresses or is arty and alternative. Most likely to say: “It’s so easy, only takes a jiffy and well, making it yourself just shows that extra bit of love, don’t you think?”

The Vegan Eco Mum

Lovely and well-meaning but playdates and parties are a minefield – no plastic, no eggs, no sugar, no dairy, clean-eating, no artificial anything. You spend the entire time trying to keep her curious kids away from the ice cream and cake. Most likely to say: “Oh gosh no, my kids would never want to eat anything like that’ – while her kids are stuffing mouthfuls of it behind her back.

The Work at Home Trendy Dad

These school run dads are often seen in cycling gear or dressed like an aging hipster in T-shirt and shorts. Talks loudly about his freelance work and invites himself to the mums’ coffee shop meet-ups. Most likely to say: “So, did I tell you about my latest project?”

The Drive-by Mums

Harassed and stressed, they park on the double yellow lines outside the school gates and throw the kids out of the car before roaring off. Kids always still munching on a slice of toast as they haven’t had a proper breakfast. Can either be in PJs or in work suits. Most likely to say: “Quick, hurry up, get out before the traffic warden comes!”

The Scooter Grans and Granddads

Heroic golden oldies who’ve swapped retirement for hardcore childcare duties so mum and dad can work. Always seen slowly making their way home laden with children’s scooters.Most likely to say: “Don’t tell mummy’ while dishing out big bags of Haribo at pick-up time.

The Good Enough Mums

Always makes drop-off by the skin of her teeth, usually feed the ‘beige rainbow’ at playdates, often in jogging bottoms with hair in a messy topknot but loves her kids before anything else. Most likely to say: “Is it too early for wine o’clock?”

I have to say – I’ve not seen a handbag dog mum on the school run before which is kinda disappointing! Which of these do you recognise in yourself and in others? Do leave a comment and and don’t forget to give it a share on social if it tickled you!
And if you enjoyed this post why not check out my school run essentials?
Cover picture: Designed by Freepik

23 comments

  1. Oh my these are so funny! I actually work in my daughters school so I don’t see other mums from my daughters class. However I can name many of my class’s parents from your list lol! Yes I have also spotted a handbag dog mum (well a dog shoved in a mums zipped up jacket) – kinda similar haha!

  2. This was a fun read. I recognised loads of mums from our school gate in this, lol. I’m probably a cross between the craft mum and the good enough mum – ie love crafting and baking myself but would never wrinkle my nose at someone else’s shop bought cake, and more messy top knots that tea dresses. Would say no to a glass of wine.

  3. Haha! Loved this. I’ve only just started doing the school run but I think I’m somewhere I between the WhatsApp and craft mum…. though less judgy!! I have nowt against shop cakes (Morrison’s donuts are amazing)! I’d probablh intend to do crafty/baking stuff but then forget when the project/school fete was due! My mum and Dad don’t live near by but they are definitely the scooter grandparents with my niece and nephew!!

  4. I’m not sure which of these mums I fall into. I work full time and only get to do the school run once a week but can definitely spot some of these mum types in the playground!

  5. Ha ha I made quite a few mums at my school nervous after I published one with 14 types of parent. I wonder if people with give you a wide berth too or ask you if it’s based on them! What I LOVE is you’ve just come out with a load more which makes me realise how many different types of parent there are. We’re all just human but man I’m dying at the handbag dog one because I’m seriously looking for a little bag for my little pooch so that I can easily take her with me at drop-off!!! And I’m not organised enough to even be a WhatsApp mum…always find stuff out far too late. I’m a horror.

  6. This is hilarious! I took the quiz and got the WhatsApp mum which is say is pretty accurate! Well, I think I’m a cross between that and the good enough mum. I’ve certainly come across a few of the others!

  7. Love it. I’m probably closet to a Good Enough Mum. Though mainly fall into the 12th category of “Leaves it to the Childminder Neglectful Mum… Shaming….but keeps me safe from the clipboard gang! #coolmumclub

  8. Coming from one state to another, I went from being surrounded by the athletic gear moms to the Pinterest perfect crafty moms and PTA moms. I think I have a dab of all of these in me. Love my kids and they’ll get to school!
    #CoolMumClub

  9. This literally made me laugh out loud. I wonder which kind of mum I am and which category people would put me in! I will be looking out for these mums tomorrow morning! #CoolMumClub

  10. I love the cross section of replies here – people identifying with some of these, totally not seeing themselves in any of these and seeing a lot of these at their schools too! Thanks for all the comments lovelies x

  11. I’m not 100% sure which one I fall into. Part crafty and part good enough. I can be found herding my girls into the school alongside gym bunnies. I hate the pretense in the air with the air kisses etc and just want to be in and out. #CoolMumClub

  12. Haha so funny! I can definitley recognise a few of those mums and I’m please to see you’ve included a dad too! I’m not too sure which one I am, a bit of a mix of whatsapp and good enough mum and some days drive by! At the moment I’m an absent from the school gate Mum because my kids are walking home while I write this. #coolmumsclub

  13. So funny, but I’m not sure our school has many of these. I’m not really any of them. I bake cakes, and would like to be on the PTA but the meetings are always in work time. I’m always dropping off to get to work but rarely in a rush and we have a car park to park in. We have a FB group and I suppose I do ask a few questions in there. I’m probably a mix of most of them. #coolmumclub

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