Getting pregnant after a miscarriage and how to overcome your fears

One of the most difficult decisions in life for a woman to make is deciding to have another baby after you have suffered a loss previously through a miscarriage. And even if you and your partner choose to put away the condom so that you can get pregnant again after your loss, it may take you quite a while before you can enjoy being pregnant again.

Although it is normal for you to worry that you might lose your baby again, it is important that you understand pregnancy after a miscarriage and the various steps you can take so that you can have a healthy pregnancy.

Why do miscarriages happen?

Miscarriage is the accidental loss of a pregnancy before you reach your 20th week. Most of the times, a miscarriage may occur when the baby is not developing normally. This may be due to the problems with the baby’s chromosomes that lead to early pregnancy loss.

According to doctors, abnormal foetal chromosomes contribute to 50% of all miscarriages that happen. Most of these chromosomal abnormalities usually arise by chance as the embryo cells divide themselves to grow. However, sometimes health conditions may cause an early loss of pregnancy, such as uterine problems or poorly controlled diabetes. There are usually some cases in which the reasons for a miscarriage are always unknown.

When should you try again for another baby after your loss?

Many emotions do accompany a miscarriage. The emotions are always a mixture of grief, anger and the fear that it might happen again. For couples who have endured such a loss, it may take them time before they can decide on when they should try again.

Although medical experts can offer their opinions in the mix, the decision to try again is usually a personal one. However, sometimes losing your pregnancy through a miscarriage may leave you emotionally overwhelmed making you confused and undecided on whether you should try to conceive again or not and when you should do it.

Although the World Health Organization recommends that a woman who has lost a baby through a miscarriage should wait for up to six months to get pregnant again, recent studies by scientists have revealed that conceiving again soon after a miscarriage is no riskier for you and the foetus than waiting for six months.

The findings revealed that after a miscarriage, you would be 70% more likely to conceive again within your first three months. According to Dr Enrique Schisterman, a senior medical practitioner at the Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, women who try for another baby within the first three months after a miscarriage get pregnant faster than those who wait for more than three months.

These findings, therefore, show that you don’t have to follow the traditional advice of waiting for up to 6 months or more after a miscarriage to try and get pregnant again, the most important thing is that as long as you feel ready, you can go for another baby.

What are the odds of you having another miscarriage?

Findings indicate that the startling statistics are between 10 to 20% of all known pregnancy always end in miscarriage. However, it is very difficult for you to miscarry more than once unless you have a serious medical condition that is hindering you from going through with your pregnancy up to the ninth month.

Studies show that in most cases, a woman who experiences a miscarriage will only do so once in her lifetime since most women who have undergone a miscarriage have gone on to have healthy pregnancies afterwards.

Reasons for being anxious after a miscarriage

Sometimes you may find it difficult to feel excited about a subsequent pregnancy after losing your previous one. This may make your pregnancy to be the longest nine months of your life since a lot will be going on with you emotionally that your anxiety is bound to be prevalent throughout the pregnancy.

According to Kim Klugger-Bell who is a psychotherapist, recognizing your loss and finally accepting it can help to reduce your anxiety. She further suggests a list of things you can do to stay positive:

  • Focus on one day at a time: It’s normal to find yourself worrying about the future based on the loss that you have experienced in the past. However, you should try to think only about the moment that you are in and what you are feeling at that moment. This mindfulness will make you feel better by reducing your stress levels since you won’t have to worry about the unknown.
  • Find out what happened: You will realise that by talking to your doctor or midwife and finding out what might have caused your loss, you will be calmer and reassured about your subsequent pregnancy. You will also feel more in control of your pregnancy.
  • Share your worries: Coping with the feelings of a loss of pregnancy alone is a heavy burden that you don’t have to put on your shoulders. You and your partner can support each other since all of you suffered a loss. You can also talk to a close friend or a family member to reassure you that all will be well.
  • Take good care of yourself: You should do your best to make your pregnancy a healthy one. Eating well, having enough sleep and regular physical exercises will make you feel relaxed and emotionally balanced.

Conclusion

It’s natural to be anxious about another pregnancy if you have lost a pregnancy before due to a miscarriage. However, if not checked, your anxiety can cause you physical, emotional and mental difficulties in your subsequent pregnancy. Too much stress is also known to be a contributing factor to miscarriages.

Since you don’t want to lose another baby, you should do everything in you can to overcome your anxieties. Remember that most women who have undergone a miscarriage have gone on to have healthy pregnancies afterwards. If you are not yet decided whether to conceive again after a miscarriage, I encourage you to get pregnant again.

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