Advice for parents on getting a child’s first phone

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There is no denying that phones are a crucial communication and entertainment tool for every member of the human race. While the average age for a child’s first phone is 11, there are many children who will have one a lot younger – typically from year 5 or 6 – although for many, a child’s first phone will come in line with when they go to secondary.

Kids use their phones for making calls, sending emails and accessing the Internet. Parents usually teach their children how to use phones first so they can keep in touch with family and friends. That said, you would be surprised at how many children seem to already know without being taught – mainly because they have already been using ours before they get their own!

The importance of a child’s first phone

Phones are especially helpful for contacting family and friends as children become more independent, especially at the time of going to school by themselves. As your child starts leaving the house without you more and more frequently, they become vital for keeping in touch with parents in order to let them know their whereabouts and troubleshoot any problems or questions they might have whilst they are out independently from you. or simply to have some reassurance or a chat at the end of the line.

Teach and modelling responsible use

It is crucial as a parent that you teach your child first learn how to use a phone responsibly since it will save a lot of headaches and heartache later down the line. After teaching your child how to use a phone, have them put the phone away for a few days and then call them on it to check on how things are going. If you want your child to use their phone responsibly, it’s important that you as a parent model the same behaviour also. Don’t expect one rule for them and another for you. For example, if you expect no phones at the dinner table, you’ll have to abide that too – and no excuses!

One of the best ways to set screen time boundaries is to lead by example. If you’re always looking at your phone, chances are your kid will be, too. Your child is watching you for social cues. Limit your own time and make it a rule that there is no cellphone use during dinner time.

Child’s first phone: Setting boundaries

Yes, smartphones are a fun and useful communication tool. However, children who use them too much can become unable to control their emotions. Parents should teach their children good phone habits starting at a young age. This way they’ll develop healthy relationship skills and avoid dangerous behaviours. This can be long before they get their own phone i.e. when they borrow yours. But it’s never too late to start, and the advent of a child’s first phone is a good time also.

You’ll want to set boundaries for your child when it comes to screen time duration, using mobile apps, online games and other such programs on their phone. Some parents decide to sit down and write a phone agreement with their child which is a great way of setting boundaries and managing expectations on both sides.

Why cellphone boundaries are necessary

Studies show a clear link between kids who spend too much time on smartphones and those who get poor sleep and grades. Research has found children who sit in front of screens, rather than those who have an active lifestyle, are more likely to become overweight or obese. Other physical conditions your child might experience include eye fatigue and tension headaches. Extended cell phone usage leads to the muscles around your kid’s eyes getting tired or tense, leading to a headache. 

Digital addiction is a growing concern. The average person spends 24 hours a week online, and over 17 are spent on screens at home. This increased screen time can worsen a child’s mental health. Studies have documented that teens are more likely to develop depressive symptoms with excessive screen time usage. Thankfully, you can help your child improve their emotional and physical help by reducing their screen time.

child's first phone
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Monitoring use

Use a calendar

Try using an interactive media time calendar to plan how much time your kid spends on screens and other activities. Having a clear picture of how your child spends their time will allow you to set better boundaries. Next, write your kid’s schedule down on a poster and put it in a prominent location so you can both refer to the calendar.

If you plan to limit your child’s cell phone usage to two hours a day, perhaps an hour after school and one before bedtime, make sure they are aware of the change. Point it out on the calendar and refer to it if your child puts up a fight. Understand that it could be a difficult transition at first, but it’s ultimately for their good.   

Monitoring access at night and at home

Parents should monitor what their children do on phones and restrict access at night. Apps are designed especially for children, making it easy for them to access inappropriate content. Kids also have quick access to social media, which can lead to sleepless nights and anxiety if they spend too much time on it.

Many schools have a policy already in place to limit phone usage during school hours. You may decide to check on their phone and messages at the end of the day or use apps that can alert you to what they are using and how on their phone. This should be agreed with your child in an honest way as part of the phone arrangement so they do not feel like you are spying on them and behaving in a distrustful or intrusive way.

No phone zones

A practical way of monitoring use while they are at home is by making their room a no phone zone. You can do this by ensuring your child doesn’t go to sleep with their phone or charge their device in their room overnight. Help your child understand this new rule of a screen-free room is for their benefit because they will sleep better and be healthier.

This rule might get a lot of pushback, especially from older kids, but see it through. Children who have devices in their rooms have increased screen time compared to kids who don’t. It’s up to you to help your child by setting the boundary of no cellphones at bedtime.   

Install apps

Another tactic to encourage your child to step away from their phone is to install apps to enable routine breaks. This can remind your kid to set the cellphone down and get up and walk around. Some apps lock the screen for a set amount of time, while others send a reminder to move around. Even a timer app, which you can arrange for 30 minutes or an hour, serves well to remind your child to put down their phone and return to their homework.

Being aware of online bullying

Extended use of electronic devices can make young people vulnerable to bullying and other negative behaviour. Because of this, it’s recommended that children do not take their phones into their rooms with them or after hours and instead always use them in a communal area in the house with another parent present especially when they are starting out. If you start noticing behaviour or mood changes in your child – for example, if they start seeming edgy, anxious or withdrawn, this could be a sign that something is amiss.

Educate your child about the internet

Talk to them about their digital footprint and the importance of being a kind online citizen. What they say stays, whether they’re playing a game online or posting a comment on social media. The internet’s memory is long, and your child must understand all their words will likely be accessible in the future. 

You can also try to assist your teen on social media by friending them on several accounts so you know what it happening there. Become familiar with the differences between TikTok, Instagram, Snapchat and Twitter to keep track of their online presence. Doing so can ensure they stay safe and follow a set of rules you agree on.

child's first phone
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Phones are essential tools that help us stay connected with loved ones and keep us informed about the world around us. Kids learn best when they’re engaged in hands-on experiences so it’s important to make sure you set reasonable limits for your child when it comes to using phones responsibly.

Summing up

If you are about to get your child’s first phone, it’s important to give it some thought and have a plan in place. Smartphones are an excellent communication tool for young people. However, excessive use can lead to emotional instability if users aren’t smart about using them responsibly. Kids should be encouraged to use phones responsibly starting at an early age. Doing so will help them build healthy habits which they will take with them through their life for the good of their overall well-being which will also benefit everyone else around them.

We hope you found this advice on introducing your child’s first phone to them useful. Remember, setting your children up with healthy boundaries and habits in any walk of life is always something positive that they will keep with them forever.

Is your child ready for their first phone? Then don’t miss this fantastic giveaway!

20 comments

  1. I feel like kids are given phones way to early. I know kids will had their first phone by age 3. I think giving a child a phone should at first be out of necessity for example because they are being trusted to go to and from school alone usually around year 5 or 6. I think use of internet should be extremely limited to avoid the cold not getting access to inappropriate content to and young kids phones should be heavily monitored to avoid that as well. I also set restrictions on my stepdaughters phones where they have all day to earn use of their phones dependant on behaviour and things like their room being clean/chores done. This not only teaches them responsibility and consequences but also limits screen time this avoiding eye issues and headaches and technology dependence etc etc

  2. A phone is a useful tool for kids when they are old enough to be out and playing with their friends far from home.If an emergency happens, it makes sense for them to have some means of communication. I don’t want my kids to become so immersed in their phone that they let the world pass them by. I also don’t want them to get so used to talking and texting on a device they they don’t develop interpersonal communication skills. There is a delicate balance in there somewhere.

  3. My eldest is 11 and still doesn’t own a phone. We’ve now noticed as parents we might of left it ‘late’. A lot of her friends are wanting to video call after school or at weekends, or chat to say they want to play Roblox together. Which she will then use my phone. However I do notice this has impacted her social circle of friends, to friends understanding that she doesn’t have a phone like her peers. It’s also affects pick up time if I can’t park in my usual spot afterschool.

  4. I’ve been looking at getting my son a phone there are some great tips I will definitely be taking on board thank you

  5. I’ve been looking at getting my son a phone some great advice and tips here that I will be taking on board thank you

  6. Depends from one child to the other how responsible they are some kids nothing scares them they don’t follow rules etc other kids listen and do as told and would not take chances. So just a little testing would be good before letting a child run free with a phone.

  7. I believe once a child starts secondary school and goes on school transport then a Mobile phone is probably appropriate then I’d definitely make sure the apps were safe and content restricted and age appropriate. It’s also important to give them more independence and recognise that technology is a lot more part of every day life than it was.

  8. The internet is such a scary place. I don’t even know where to begin. But I will be limited what they do on their first phone and only I can download apps after I approved it. There will definitely be boundaries too

  9. Appeal to all parents and various educators: never let your guard down.Great article and tips, to print and frame.

  10. Choosing when to give my children their first phone has always been a very difficult conversation in our house. Our children 6 and 10years keep asking for one but I am very reluctant as feel they don’t really have a need for it at present, I am very conscious that my 10-year-old will be going to secondary school next year so he will be requiring one for that, but I want to make sure he understands the importance of what the phone is for. I don’t want it to be used wrongly and become a distraction for him. I am hoping he will have one a few months before school so that he can have a play with it and we can teach him properly. The tips you have given here are invaluable so thankyou.

  11. I’m hoping to hold off for as long as possible. The thought scares me, even though my son is sensible.

  12. I don’t want to rush to give them a phone, want them to enjoy their childhood and toys as long as possible.

  13. Its a tough one. I guess secondary school is the right time as the kids go out and you need a way of staying in contact

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