If you’re a parent who has struggled to get your teen motivated to study, you’re not alone. Even when quarantine ends, it won’t come as a shock to parents that teens tend to gravitate towards TV rather than picking up a book or taking on a new scholastic project. And it can be crushing to see your teen miss out on opportunities and sell themselves short of their academic potential because of roadblocks like self-doubt, fatigue, or even laziness, especially when you know how important it is to plan for the future ASAP.
So, how can you tie all these threads—internalizing incentive, beating laziness, and developing a proactive routine—into getting your teen motivated to study and do well in school? Don’t worry, according to career math tutor, Eric Earle, we can get your teen genuinely excited about studying. As you read these tips, it might be helpful to keep one thing in mind: it’s all about them.
4 steps to getting your teen motivated to study
#1 Have Them Voice What They Want to Do
Figuring out what your teen wants to do is the very first step in getting your teen motivated to study. This framing is everything. No matter what their ideal occupation is—whether it’s becoming an athlete, an artist, a doctor, a filmmaker, or someone who wants to write code—letting your teen’s interests lead the way is going to help both of you orient their work in school through their passions.
It’s important to remember that it’s okay if your teen doesn’t know what they want to do. Sometimes it can seem scary to not know when their peers have been on one career track since the age of two. But everyone’s path is different and using homework and school as a means to test their interests is a great way to figure out where their interests lie. You can help your teen figure this out through conversations over dinner, asking them generally about their interests outside of school, and taking inventory of what they like to spend their time doing.
What many teens don’t realize is that their interests can be tied to almost everything they do in school. It’s just a matter of asking them, “how does this assignment relate to your interest?” Asking this question reorients the very idea of what studying is. Homework, if we think about it, is really just a form of practice and application. If you want to play at the concert, you have to make mistakes and develop your understanding of the music in the garage. The same thing applies to studying and making mistakes to get better and better until they’ve perfected applying their interests to their schoolwork.
If your teen is able to consistently apply their interests to each and every homework assignment, they can develop the long-term strength to keep that energy when the task at hand doesn’t clearly relate to what they want to do. So, when laziness or self-doubt starts to take over, you can guide the work back to what is interesting to your teen.
The question, “How does this inform you about something you care about,” isn’t asked in school nearly as much as it needs to be. It can help transform studying into its own reward. When your teen asks themselves this question when it comes to studying, it can help them to think of that work as an exercise of informing them about their passion.
The importance of figuring out what your teens interests are cannot be overstated. Once your teen determines what that is, they can develop their own reward systems, come up with a study plan, and calculate where they can direct their efforts.
#2 Have Them Explain the Rewards (But You Can Add on Too)
We’ve already talked about how studying can be a reward in and of itself, but it can also be helpful for your teen to think about the actual benefits that can come from doing the work. On the simplest level, the very idea of a reward helps motivate us to act. When we think of rewards, our brain releases dopamine that pushes us to further emulate the cause of those positive signals. So, let’s use that knowledge to our advantage:
One thing you can do to use rewards as motivation for your teen is to have them clearly establish what they are. If your teen feels like you are the one coming up with all the benefits of studying, the rewards might not feel genuine or true to what they want to do. Furthermore, you want your teen to genuinely work for whatever benefits studying might provide.
When teens formally recognize what they want to achieve, where they would like to be in ten years, or even simply what makes them happy, its easier for them to respond to the question, “What should I be doing right now?” Having a reminder that your teen is the one who came up with the reward, and it’s up to them to claim it, can help internalize how they should be spending their time.
Sometimes, sitting back and relaxing is exactly the right response. But even watching TV has its limits. Compared to the long-term goals that your child has in mind, whether it’s starting their own business or rolling through the entrance to Harvard medical school, reminding teens that it’s up to them to bridge the gap to help them achieve what they want through school can help give them an internal push to act. Keeping these incentives on a deskside post-it note or by the TV can be a good reminder to work toward their goals by hitting the books.
You can also help your teen establish rewards for studying by asking them if they identify with any that you have in mind. Maybe impressing friends with a good grade on their math test is something that would appeal to them. Or perhaps sharing a robust understanding of their class’ reading is something they can use as a talking point during a party. In any case, it’s important that your teen is the one to identify a motivation that is genuine to them so it sticks when you’re not around.
Another rewards tactic you can use to help motivate your teen to study is negotiate new rewards for them to study. Maybe they get to pick the takeout spot or movie at the end of the week if they complete all their homework on time. Or perhaps you can pick some check-in points throughout the school year that correlate to
#3 Have Them Come Up with a Plan (Yes, Add to This One as Well)
If your teen can identify their goals, have them do the research and talk to you about it. No one likes being told what to do, but if your teen is able to identify the steps they need to take to reach their goals, then it can be more exciting for them to share their plans and verify them with you.
You can prompt your teen to develop their own plan for success by asking them questions that require research. Questions like, “what can you do to get from point A to point B” frames preparation in a way so that your teen will need to understand what they need to do to reach their goals, and why. If your teen understands that navigating opportunities—like higher education or even owning a house—is a process that requires commitment to studying on their own terms, it can motivate your teen to study and do well on their homework because they understand why it’s necessary.
Having an understanding of how to reach their goals circumvents any need to keep reminding them why they need to study. Instead, they’ll have an internal reference to come up with a plan of their own and know the consequences of missing a step. As teenagers move into a stage of independence, shifting the responsibility of coming up with a plan on to them will help motivate your teen to study. With fewer scapegoats and a greater personal responsibility to do well, teens are more likely to value a study plan and stick to it.
Another tactic for developing a plan is to explain to your child how you or others have gone about approaching similar tasks. If there are professionals that your child would like to emulate, it can be inspiring to look up how they achieved success and follow suit. This kind of planning can help reorient your child’s career path and you can direct them to the navigate that path through their school system in a positive manner. Taking advantage of resources like the library and educators with a passion for their craft is a great way to help your teen subvert laziness by getting excited about their studies.
If your teen needs some help getting started, they might want to review what math tutors consider the most necessary study habits so they can pick and choose which study tricks are best for them and help them achieve their goals.
#4 Have Them Voice Their Strengths and Areas Where They Struggle
Finally, talk with your teen about what their strengths and weaknesses are. Sometimes, laziness around studying has less to do with putting in effort than fearing the negative consequences of failing after trying in the first place. In other instances, teens might get frustrated that studying is difficult, and they could be offput by the challenges. No matter the case, defining where your teens strengths and struggles are can help prioritize their time and in turn help get your teen motivated to study.
One benefit to having your teen voice their strengths and weaknesses is that they can reflect on their status. Formally recognizing these distinctions can help your teen use their strengths as a guide and take note of their struggles so they aren’t confused about why one subject is taking longer to master than the others.
If you find that reading literature is their strong suit but math is weighing them down, you could prioritize the easy tasks so they won’t be as mentally drained when they get to the later, or vice versa. Starting with a small task might mean that they can spend more time developing calculus or IB Maths homework and switch over to another subject after spending the maximum amount of study time on that one subject.
Finding out where your teen’s struggles lie can also be a sign to seek extra help. Talking to teachers or seeking out a tutor to help guide them for the difficult subjects can make studying easier and less daunting. Often times, you’ll find that educators reward students who seek help because they recognize the effort and are willing to work more closely with them. It’ll also help you understand your child’s thought process and empathize with their struggles rather than punishing them for not doing well. This community support is highly underutilized in academia and it can help give your teen the confidence and motivation they need to study.
Let’s get to studying!
Studying can be hard, but getting to know your teen more and have them prioritize their interests is one of the best ways to motivate your teen to study and do the work. The great thing about unlocking all of these motivations in your teen is that they’re long lasting and help them negotiate the positive aspects of their life along with the struggles. By implementing these study tips, your teen can spend more time committed to doing what they love.
We hope you found these tips on getting your teen motivated to study helpful!
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