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This week is Mental Health Awareness Week, and what I wanted to talk about this week is how hard it can be taking care of your mental health when your head is noisy and your surroundings are even noisier. Things can feel all too much sometimes, and finding headspace to do things for you can become almost impossible amongst the chaos of it all. It has taken a few too many burnouts for me to realise that in order to look after everyone else at the best of my ability, I first need to look after MYSELF at the best of my ability, especailly when life gets tough!

I had to learn how to make myself a priority, and of course after being a passenger in my own life for so long, it wasn’t something that came naturally. The good news is I have found a way that gets results! Writing down these small but significant self-care activities, I was able to actually incorporate myself into my busy schedule. It sounds so simple, but literally putting myself on the to-do list!

So this Mental Health Awareness Week, I wanted to share ten ways to take care of your mental health whilst taking care of others:

10 ways to take care of yourself whilst looking after others this Mental Health Awareness Week

1. Take it or leave it

This was something a friend said and it’s really stuck. Take the time when it shows up. Leave the chores if you need to. You could continuously move all day long, the jobs are endless and there is little satisfaction. So if some time appears, leave the to-do list and sit down and take the time!

2. Take care of your mental health by getting rid of the mind monsters

 If you are finding that your head is getting overwhelmed with lists and constant noise it’s SO important that you recognise this and catch it quick. Don’t forget not everything you think is true. Get used to coaching your mind, ask questions. Is that really helpful? It is necessary to be obsessing about this? It’s a way of getting some perspective on your reality. Act as a friend to yourself, question things and be as pragmatic as you can be and always respond with kindness! 

3. Find help for the things that are overwhelming you

Okay, this is an important one! Outsource what you can. Or find clever ways to gain back time. Just like in a job you would project manage the situation, try and find time to sit down with a pen and piece of paper and work out what is stressing you out! We love the Positive Planner’s ‘BrainTangle’ which is a creative way of finding out what you need.

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4. Take it day by day 

Sometimes it can all get a bit much and when we overthink every eventuality, it can create huge amounts of stress and eventually total wipeout! We suggest in The Positive Planner that you break it down into actionable lists that you can achieve to help boost your sense of wellbeing and feel accomplished at the end of the day. We recommend that you do something called ‘the magic three’ which is the three most important things you absolutely need to get done, everything after that is bonus. Then you really feel like you are winning!

5. Set your intentions 

As well as the (realistic) to-list, it is a good idea to set some intentions for the day. We all have those things we wish we could be more of. So think of an intention as more of a ‘to-be’ than a ‘to-do’. If you are feeling resentful for example, maybe you need to set an intention to be more grateful for what you do have rather than what you don’t. Many of us can just be clenching our fists and holding our breaths through the day, in which case maybe you need to make an intention to be more mindful or simply just relax your shoulders and breathe more!

6. Give yourself something to look forward to 

We all deserve treats and sometimes planning something in the evening can give us something to hold on to during the day. Evenings can be a huge non-event, but if you decide on something you know will fill you back up again, the chances are you will make it happen! This is a way of replenishing your energy levels, feeling like yourself again after a busy day and going to sleep in a better state of mind.

7. Don’t bite off more then you can chew

Talking from experience on this one. We have the tendency to say YES to everything, but I’m learning that being realistic is actually kinder to everyone else involved, including myself! It’s all about knowing your boundaries. Just taking on what is realistic is a good way of keeping stress levels down to a minimum. It’s all about keeping the communications open with others. We always expect that people will be disappointed with us but in fact, we are all human and 9 times out of 10 they will respond with an understanding of your situation.

8. Cut yourself some slack

Sounds so obvious, but really we all need to be a little kinder to ourselves. We expect such a lot and our ridiculous expectations of ourselves really impact our confidence levels and in turn our sense of wellbeing. Some days are good and some are bad, but we are all human and it’s important to remember this to take care of your mental health.

9. Embrace your inner imperfections

I am starting to see my imperfections as part of who I am and embracing them bit more! It’s all about understanding that we are all just trying our best! Even just having awareness of these can be so life-changing and somehow by treating our imperfections with kindness we are able to allow ourselves to be more authentic and truer to ourselves. We can’t be good at everything, it’s not in our nature. Take care of your mental health by embracing what you do have and honour the parts of you that show up anyway and try!

10. Take the power back

This was a huge realisation for me, especially when suffering from anxiety and depression in the early years of motherhood. The only person that can take the power back is you. You are in control. Others can help you but honestly the only person that can save you and take care of your mental health is YOU. This means that whatever you need to do, you have to make happen if you know it will help you.

Make yourself a project in your own life. Have frank conversations with those around you and get yourself a self-care plan in place. Self-care is just the start but showing yourself love and kindness is something you will never regret. It’s important we understand that whilst our friends and family want the best for us, the only person who is capable of implementing daily routines to help you keep mentally on track of yourself.